“Where are we going?” She asked
And we laughed.
Life is driving down a long highway,
Where every twenty minutes
He passes a cross.
An eye for an eye leaves you intact,
As long as you don’t take any eyes.
The town was saved!
The damsel married the hero!
Then they slowly grew apart,
(Their love was tied to the quest, after all)
And they divorced on his thirtieth birthday.
He fell back in love with a whiskey bottle.
They’re very happy together.
He was not a perfect man,
But he had a perfect car
And that’s close enough, sometimes.
This is to see how well you can lie,
How frequently you can lie,
And how convincing your lies are.
Truthful answers will result in dismissal.
The person whose writing is the most like ours
Will be awarded fabulous prizes
And allowed to pick someone similar
For next year’s contest.
Don’t ask how the sausage, regulatory policy,
Sister, Brand-name clothing, universe,
Veal, scripture, lipstick, carbonated drink,
Brother, favorite song, Santa Claus,
Rocky Mountain Oyster, or diamond ring
Now, I’m okay with gay guys,
But I wouldn’t want one dating my daughter.
A RED FOX
I saw a red fox in far-flung fields,
I tried to get close to it
But it called my Aunt Esther ugly.
First, five syllables
Second, seven syllables
Wait, something has gone horribly wrong here.
Happy National Poetry Month, everyone.